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I'm a Fool, Brother

Author: Leopard
Rating: Moderate
Status: Complete

Also known as obligatory post-Thor 2 feels and making a bad scene worse. Basically what probably wouldn't have happened had Loki died more slowly and painfully and for real and Thunderfrost was actually canon. Hurrah!

Shock. The only emotion Thor could feel as the blade entered the heart of Kurse. Loki had saved him. In fact, Thor had been so sure of Loki's actual betrayal, he was surprised to still be alive. Loki grinned at his brother briefly, knowing full well he's just saved his brother's life. How short lived that was. Kurse ouldn't have just died straight away could it? It just had to have revenge. It just had to impale Loki through the same blade that had doomed it.

Thor felt cold to the bone as Loki's body was thrown to the ground. And yet the trickster still was not dead. One of the dark elves' grenades was in Loki's hand, and then it was devouring Kurse, turning it to dust and nothing. It was still too late for Loki. Thor screamed, a gutteral cry of pain as he dropped to his knees next to his brother.

"Loki..?" he asked tentatively, lifting his brother's small frame into his arms. Loki writhed in pain, his breathing laboured, his face a grimace. Still he smirked.

"Don't be such an oaf, Thor. I'm not dead yet. That stupid creature couldn't kill anything with a blade even if it- it tried." Thor desperately tried to hold his hand over Loki's wound, but to no avail. Loki feebly batted his hand away.

"Too late for that, brother. It's too late for me now. I might not be dead yet, but I will be soon." Loki licked his suddenly dry lips, watching as Thor's eyes welled with tears. Neither were aware of Jane stood in the background, hand clasped to her mouth. 

"No, Loki, don't you dare! The allfather will know how brave you were, how you saved us all, how you-" Loki cut him off. 

"I didn't do it for him, Thor. I did it for you." The thunder god's face contorted, half a grin and half a face of sorrow. He blinked, and the tears that had beene held back started to fall freely. "No, don't give me that look. I just as easily stab you still." Loki shook slightly, his body starting to fail. Thor manged to chuckle a little. 

"I think that you couldn't stab me anyway, especially in this state." Loki blinked, his eyes shutting for a few moments longer than normal. Thor almost panicked, readjusting his grip on his brother, now more cradling him than holding him. 

"Please, Thor, don't talk like I'm going to make it out of this. I can feel it, I- ah." Loki winced as his body convulsed and he coughed violently a few times, a spattering of blood falling to his chin and onto Thor's cheek. "There, bottle it and think of me." 

"No, Loki. You aren't going to die, do you understand? We're going to go back to Asgard, we're going to fix this,we're going to - to..." Thor faltered. "Please, Loki."

"Norns, you are as stubborn as ever, aren't- aren't you?" Thor twisted to grip his cape, ripping a piece off, once again trying to prevent Loki's fate. "Thor- Thor stop. Listen to me." Thor accepted defeat, releasing his cape and instead focusing on making Loki more comfortable. 

"Thor, after all this time - only you still truly care for me. And I have never told you the same. I have- I haven't ever really wanted to hurt you, I just... I just wanted to make you see that you were always better than me. You could call it jealousy, Odin does. I did, for a while. But no, now I see." Loki was struggling to speak; his breathing heavy and painful. Thor wanted to tell him to be quiet, to rest, to not struggle. Loki would have clawed his eyes out, so instead he soaked up every one of his brother's last words. Tears now spiked Loki's eyes as well as 

"You are my brother Thor. You have never given up hope, for me. Oh, Hel, Thor. I'm a fool. I should- I need to- I should have said it before." Loki swallowed, his skin starting to lose colour, becoming ashen, grey. "I love you Thor, my brother. Don't you dare forget me. I care not what Odin thinks, in the end. Just- for me - be happy. Live a life, with Jane, and please-" Loki cried out, the pain unbearable. Thor brushed the hair from Loki's face, his mouth half open. Loki's breathing was fast now. He shook uncontrollably. 

With his last effort, Loki fixed his eyes onto Thor's and whispered "I love you, Thor." Loki spasmed, curling up and twitching. Thor held his head, maintaining eye contact. Loki's lips quivered as if he were trying to say something, but no words came out any more. Suddenly his breathing was calm, and shallow, and then nothing. Nothing. 

"No, Loki. No, please. No!" A sob took Thor as he cradled his brother, dead in his arms. Thor put his hand on Loki's stone face, over hs heart, on his hand. "Please, Loki, come back. You can't say such things and then give up!" Thor shook his brother, trying to shake the life back into him. But Loki was dead. 

Thor placed his body gently on the ground before clenching his fists and shouting to the sky, a loud and clear and broken cry. "No!" He was vaguely aware of Jane's hand on his shoulder as he put his head in his hands and openly wept. 

"Come back, you liar! You can't be dead! Even before you didn't die, the bifrost, remember? You survived that, you can survive this, please. Oh, Hel, Loki." Jane knelt in the mud beside him, quietly. 

"Come on, Thor. He truly is gone. There's nothing more you can do. You tried-" Thor turned his head to look at her, his face a mess of emotion; anger, pain and grief. 

"I didn't try hard enough. I should have taken him, I should have- I should have-" Thor couldn't say anything. How could Loki only admit these things on his deathbed? How could he leave like that, after saving them all? 

"There wasn't anything you could do. Come on, we have to try and at least find a shelter, if there is no way back. There's no point in us dying here too. At least let's fill his dying wish." 

"He can't be dead." Thor whispered, his voice broken, child-like. "I won't leave him." Jane understood his sorrow, but also could see clearly that it was going to be some form of night soon and that they really shouldn't be in the open. 

"Carry him then." Thor shook his head.

"No. We must give him the burial he deserves here. None on Asgard would care to do the same." 

"What if you were to want to visit his grave?" 

"There will be no grave." 

Thor dragged Mjolnir across the soil, digging a shallow pit, itno which he placed Loki's body tenderly. He could not be mistaken for sleep; his skin was grey and cracked, not like one of Asgard though neither like one of Jotunheim. In silence, Thor and Jane stood as a fire burned over Loki, consuming him swiftly.

After some time, Thor turned away from the pyre. 

They walked away, the fire starting to die. Only ashes remained.